A lorry carrying an octopus has broken down at Oxford Circus. Approach with care.
1. This has happened.
2. This has definitely happened.
3. It has now been moved out of harm’s way so members of the general public are not currently at risk of attack.
5. In other news, Twitter has been amusing this morning.
Confirmed: it belongs to Betfair.
And that is the story of the giant octopus in central London.