1. People stay cool this way.
2. Instead of this way.
3. You can actually see the performers onstage.
4. Instead of craning your neck at the back.
5. You can eat like this.
6. Instead of like this.
7. You can drink mojitos.
8. Rather than beer (?) from an unwashed tube.
9. Couples can relax in the sun.
10. Without fear of bumping helmets.
11. The scariest thing you'll encounter is this.
12. Instead of this.
13. Or this.
14. You have a cabin with a gorgeous view and a bed to pass out in.
15. Instead of having to use the parking lot.
16. There are honest-to-God bathrooms.
17. In fact, the bathrooms look like this.
18. And not this.
19. The baby will have a pleasant time.
20. Instead of getting heat stroke in the hot Indio sun.
21. You get to chill with the performers...
22. ...who are legitimately chill.
23. You can hang out with these happy people.
24.
25.
26. Instead of him.
27. And you never have to lay eyes on any of these people again.
28.
29.
30.
31.
32. The only random nudity you're likely to encounter is the blow-up doll variety.
