*were*. That's what Bay does to your brain.

I managed, what, 120 minutes before I left the cinema because my ears where bleeding. The last film I walked out of was Oliver Stone's Alexander. That about sums it up.

“Too bad it can't transform into a good movie.” -Slate

People who think that just because a movie's existence means quality sure won't want to read the Transformers 2 review in most outlets. Critics have not been giving a favorable Transformers 2 review. The film has been pilloried in the press as having a labyrinthine plot that is ultimately lacking depth, and it received a 20% approval on Rotten Tomatoes, the film review site, and it appears a fast payday loan isn't going to reverse the tide. Director Michael Bay is frequently lambasted by critics as a hack that relies on effects rather than plot, and the Transformers 2 review stream seems to reflect this view, but it likely won't stop people from getting fast cash to watch it.

“Terry Schiavo would have been bored by this bloated, ponderous piece of shit,” - Devin Faraci, CHUD.com.

Harry Knowles from AintItCoolNews “Steven Spielberg should be embarrassed to have his name on shoddy storywork like this. Shame on you Steven. Kids will be lining up for this - and they'll be met with dog fucking, cussing, racial stereotypes and more. I seriously wonder if Spielberg was thinking of Mudflap & Skids as he watched the inauguration of Barack Obama - because he'd read the script at that point, he knew what his name was bringing, and yet he still had the gall to attend. The filmmakers, studio and toymakers behind this film should be ashamed. To spend this type of money to bring this sort of hurtful and repugnant work to screen - it is an insult to every DREAM that so many have WORKed for, for years. I'd like to ask you not to support this film, but those of you with young boys, I know there isn't a chance. But realize you'll be taking them to see a film with the lowest forms of humor, stereotypes and racism around. Not only that, but its packaged for our children. Which makes it all the more offensive.”

Peter Travers - Rolling Stone “I know there are still 17 months to go, but I'm thinking Transformers 2 has a shot at the title Worst Movie of the Decade.”

these just make me want to see it that much more

Wait, wait, wait… Somebody actually reviewed Megan Fox's performance ?

It was terrible, but somehow one of the reviewers cites the single worst scene- the blond coed who is secretly and obviously a robot- as something worth seeing. Even when they hate a movie that I hate, I find I have little in common with most movie critics.

The 9 Most Scathing Critical Responses to Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Read More On movieline.com ›

The best part is that is that it's still going to be waaaay better than 500 Days of Summer. Eat it Tommy Solomon!

The Guardian review “Bay has a great love of flashy effects, stroboscopic editing and loud crashes; he famously calls his cinematic technique “fucking the frame”. That phrase might be brutal, but it's accurate. And there's no doubt about it: he really has given the frame a right old seeing-to this time. Bay has turned up at the frame's flat with some unguent massage oils, scented candles and a hundredweight of Viagra. It isn't long before the headboard of the frame's bed is crashing repeatedly against the wall, while the frame gazes up at the ceiling … and I think the frame is faking it.”

I honestly didn't think it was that bad. It wasn't the worst movie I ever saw…

Alfonso Duralde - MSNBC “…a cinematic avalanche in which Michael Bay eschews anything resembling plot or characters and instead screams at the audience’s eyes for two and a half hours. “