17 Reasons "Hocus Pocus" Should Be A Broadway Musical

It needs to happen ASAP.

1. There’s already a built-in fanbase for Hocus Pocus, which has only grown over the past 20 years (thanks to seasonal showings on ABC Family).

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2. People can’t keep seeing Wicked over and over, they NEED another musical about witches.

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3. The world would FINALLY have a full version of “I Put a Spell on You.”

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4. And who wouldn’t want an expanded version of Sarah Sanderson’s eerie “Come Little Children?”

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5. Ice would get a solo song (or possibly a rap) about how badass he is.

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6. The costumes would be insane.

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7. Don’t even start on how incredible the makeup would be.

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8. It’s always cool to have animals onstage, and just like with productions of Annie, they could choose a shelter cat to play Thackery Binx.

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9. Or if a live cat is too unruly, they can just pull the mechanical puppet that played Salem on Sabrina the Teenage Witch out of storage.

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10. They could make special edition playbills that look like Winifred Sanderson’s spellbook.



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11. Honestly, industrial fans and stage wires were INVENTED for a Hocus Pocus stage musical.

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12. Bette Midler, Kathy Najimy, and Sarah Jessica Parker have Broadway experience already, so you know they’d reprise their roles.




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13. Or better yet, they could offer the role of Mary Sanderson to their original first choice, Rosie O’ Donnell.


Or not, depending on your preference for portly goofball witches.

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14. If Sarah Jessica Parker were unavailable to play Sarah Sanderson, drag superstar Sharon Needles would fit the bill perfectly.

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15. Omri Katz isn’t up to much these days, so maybe he could reprise his role as moody virgin Max Dennison.

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So what if he’s 37? Slap a floppy wig on him and bam! Instant teenager.

OK, maybe not, but there are no rules in Broadway.

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This guy would be first in line for opening night.

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16. Hocus Pocus sort of fizzled at the box office in 1993, but so did Kinky Boots in 2005, and that was revived as a stage play and just won the Tony for Best Musical.

So why not Hocus Pocus?

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17. The whole production would need, like, $20 million in capital, tops. Totes affordable!

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