“A friend bounced a check because it takes too many steps to take a photo of it and deposit it with their iPhone.”
“Few weeks ago, a colleague of mine cried half the afternoon because she broke one of her nails and how terrible this was because she was going out that weekend.
When I tried to calm her down, she couldn’t understand why I couldn’t understand why she was upset. Did I not know how long she’s spend growing them to perfection?”
“When my friend cried because she had no idea which dress she should pick from 30+ dresses.”
“The office where I work doesn’t have a water cooler or provide bottled water. I caught myself the other day whining about how I had to walk all the way across the street to buy water from a drugstore.”
“In fourth grade, my daughter actually overheard one of her classmates say to another - they are like 9 years old remember - ‘I can’t believe I only have an iPhone 4! It’s so ridiculous my parents expect me to go to school without an iPhone 5.’”
“I once watched a woman stand by her car in a parking lot franticly pushing the unlock button on her key fob.
She said that she had to get home immediately but that her car would not open.
I kindly asked to borrow her keys then proceeded to unlock the car with the key and not the fob.
She was dumbfounded.”
“A friend complained about the hot water running out after showering for ‘only’ an hour.”
“I went out for Easter dinner and complained that the buffet at one portion of the restaurant had 4 types of meat while my section only had 3.”
“I went to the grocery store yesterday to get almond butter. There is an entire aisle dedicated to spreads. My almond butter is nowhere to be found.
I’ve been eating the same brand and same kind of almond butter for years. They know I buy it, they have to right? With the aggressive marketing of today, I’m positive this store knows what kind of underwear I wear, and what time I get up in the morning. So where’s my goddam almond butter?!?”
“[He] let the cats out onto the patio yesterday and they feasted on the striped savannah grass I was growing as a decorative plant.”
“Typical vacation-destinations are twice the price [during] school-vacations, thus we can only afford to go on 3 vacations abroad this year.”
“My son finds it a ‘problem’ that he can’t install iOS games on his Android-telephone.”
“I recall this gem from my sister: ‘Oh no, my diamond earrings are going to scratch my iphone 5!’”
“I complain when i have to hand wash my luxury high-carbon kitchen knives
because i cant put them in the dishwasher.”
“My friend called with their cell to anxiously ask for help as they were locked inside their hot car with a dead battery and the button for the automatic door locks would not work. I coached them to pull up the lock button with their fingers. They were embarrassed! We had a good laugh.”
“Our neighbour once complained because the basketball hoop on the side of our house was visible from their living room window.”
“I once complained that is was soooo stressful to own two houses.”
“[B]uying grapes you thought were seedless & then bitching for days about having to eat around the seeds.”